No Boys Allowed. What?

The night I started this blog and completed the "About Me" section, Zach read it over and pointed something out. There was no mention of him there, nor in the first post. 

"It's like I don't exist," he sniffed. And then he informed me that the strippers were coming over soon and I should get to bed. 

I assured him that he would appear far to often in my future posts--that there is no life of Ariel, Zoe, and Addie without him.  The reasons being far too intricate and far-reaching to explain at the moment, but trust this--if I had not met this man when I did, I would currently be a crazy transient living under a bridge performing unspeakable acts for a bag of Flaming Hot Cheetos. Well, probably.

Let's see, what else?  Zoe would have been adopted by a nice semi-retired couple in Fresno who would name her Butters Dandelion, push her around in those creepy dog strollers, and generally spoil the shit out of her. Tough luck, girl. 

Mr. and Mrs. Mandalay take the current Butters Dandelion Mandalay out for a stroll.

Adeline's very EXISTENCE hinges on Zach--had we not been forced into a blind date by Marta (then went our separate ways, and were then reunited by Marta AGAIN), her potential spirit would just be floating our there in the grand energy pool of the universe. Which kind of blows my mind now that she's sitting(!) beside me, in all her 22 pound giggling, cooing, kicking, screaming glory. 

Hey Mom, I was always around, and this whole cause& effect/alternative paths trope is TIRED. Haven't you seen Sliding Doors? Or better yet, Run, Lola, Run? Moving on...

Speaking of relevance, he insists that if we have another child she will be female, and he will be the single drop of testosterone floating voiceless, powerless, ball-less, in a turbulent sea of estrogen. He will be on the outskirts, merely a figure-head, tapped only for allowances and oil-changes.  I see it completely the opposite. Being the only male in the household, he will be the axis from which his lovely ladies will dance around him, like the center of a maypole! (k, that was a terrible metaphor, but I'm tapped tonight)  Yes, he's physically absent much of the day because of work, but doesn't that absence make him more appealing (versus mom who's around all day, every day, telling you to not touch this and don't eat that and ohmyGOD you want me to sing the same song AGAIN)? 

I wonder if other fathers whose families consist solely of women feel like they're on the periphery? The single boy in an all-girls club. I've pondered whether my own father wished he'd had at least one son to take fishing, hiking, play ball with. Wait, he did that with his daughters anyways. More along the lines...was there anything he wasn't able to talk to us about because we were girls? I think every relationship: father/son, father/daughter, mother/son, mother/daughter, is unique and dear. No better, just different. Something I was curious about tonight....

In the meantime, we're talking about getting a boy-dog for Zach :)